Sorry.

"And I really missed him (Sebby). I thought he was going to come at the right time and save the day. But instead, Kelly came. She stole all of his attention as soon as I commented his zone. She really annoys me sometimes." ~ Cessy.

"I gave up on M completely. I mean, he's got all of Kell's attention now. I'm not exactly as jealous anymore as I am disappointed about it." ~ Sebby.


Whatever makes you happy.
I'm not going to do what I normally do, go running and crying to someone, putting all of my problems on someone else.
Wanting to be babied.
But when I talk to someone, someone else gets upset.
My 3 best friends are the people I always want to talk to.
Sebby, Cessy, and Nick.

I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I cause problems for you guys.
I'm sorry if I annoy some and steals others friends.
"I'm sorry" is all I can say right now.

I try to help. Why does it seem I almost always make it worse?
I know I'm looking too much into this.
I'm holding on to things that were said a while ago.
They still hurt.

I don't want to point fingers and say "You hurt me." or something retarded like that.
All I ever wanted was for people to be happy...
Yet I whine and bitch about my problems instead.
The only thing right now that would push me over the edge would be someone leaving.
If one of my friends leave, I swear to god I'm going with them.
I'm not trying to be mean to anyone, I'm just writing this to say I'm sorry.
I am. I really am.
Please believe me.
That's all I ask.

lol... On a totally different random note, this whole week has been hell for me, I've missed 3 tests and 3 quizzes now. I'm running to the bathroom every 15 minutes... And I feel like crap.
Another day home sick.
I just keep refreshing my OZ page...
It's no use. Everyone's at school.
After this I'm probably just gonna go down in the basement and play my Kingdom Hearts and yell at the unbeatable bosses... Fun fun fun! (I really do enjoy that)
When school ends I'm most likely going to call Nick again, he's going to help me with school because I have this weird thing where I'm unable to learn my states and capitals... Who knows.
And then I'll also talk to Sebby, because I love him too fucking much and he doesn't believe me.
Always saying things like "Everyone's becoming so distant" blah blah blah. SEBBY. I ALWAYS want to call you. I love to talk to you, I love to cheer you up. etc.
I mean it.
You just have to believe me.
And stop talking about all this "I'm all alone crap" Because I love you and always want to be there for you. You're an amazing person. You just never believe me when I say it.
And Cessy. I know you're going through a rough time right now... I may be someone who just hears things from others about you. And that's where I find out about things. I'm here for you... I want to be. Yeah, you never really talk much... I'm just saying I'm here if you ever want to talk to anyone at all. If I start to annoy you just tell me.

Whatever.
I love my friends. I love them so much. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU PEOPLE.
Even IF I didn't mention you in this blog, it's because I'm stupid and tired. There are so many other people. But I've been getting lack of sleep due to this dkjfbhlerfglergbrbgjh stomach. idk.

And I don't want you to read this and then apologize or anything.
Who knows.
I could be totally wrong.
I don't really care right now.
Don't look too much into this blog like I would.
This is just a pointless rant blog that I've needed to write for a while for myself.
Just read it (If you even want to) then go on with your life.
I would probably never even post this but I'm going to anyway just to make me feel better.

I love you all.
Say whatever you want about me, I'll deal with it eventually.

Kingdom Hearts sounds pretty good now. I've almost beaten it finally, there's nothing good on tv anyway.
Bye.

Kelly.